Duty

Yesterday I gave the 4th Sunday lesson in RS. The topic was "Learning and Understanding your Duty". I based the lesson on two talks from May's General Conference. Elder Keith McMullin and Elder Henry B. Eyring. The talks are wonderful. The topic was sobering. In the midst of a chaotic world around us filled with sadness, corruption, and trial we can find solace in doing what the Lord wants us to do. By learning to do our duty, essentially we can improve the ever-decaying world around us. We can make the world a better place by doing our part...our duty.

Thoughts and impressions (and memories) flooded my mind as I prepared this lesson. I can think of no better example than that of my father-in-law when the word "duty" is uttered. And I don't think I am romanticizing things when I say that. Dennis was a man who did his duty...he contributed positively to society, he did his best to make the world a better place, he was constantly in the service of his fellow-man, and ultimately his Savior and Father in Heaven. His hands were the Lord's hands on earth. I don't think I will ever explain it well enough or do the service he performed for us, his family, justice. I will never feel like my words will adequately express my appreciation, my love, and my respect for him. I can only try, struggle/learn, repent, and humbly strive to do/be better.

The following quote from Elder Eyring seemed to jump off the page at me (in talking about an elderly gentleman who had served dutifully in his callings for his entire life): "...His nature had been changed to want what the Savior wanted. He had no fear of death. The desire of his heart was to live to give service to his family and to others of Heavenly Father's children who needed him."

I wish I had expressed this in my lesson yesterday. But I didn't. Not because I didn't WANT to, I felt like I couldn't. I didn't want to go there publicly yet. I knew how it would end, and I didn't want that all over the Relief Society pulpit. But I have been thinking about it ever since. How I needed to get this out. How I needed to express my feelings about Dennis and duty. I would do the whisperings of the Spirit injustice if I neglected to express these impressions and feelings. And so, I write them instead. In the safety of my blog...the only people reading this being my family and friends who know me and knew my father-in-law. You know what I'm talking about. You know who Dennis was, and you understand what I'm talking about when I say he did his duty. You get me, and for that I'm grateful.

I am going to try and have more courage to write out my feelings that are sometimes difficult to express. I feel like I have been holding onto a lot of them for awhile now. After Mark's post, and reading my brother-in-law's and sister-in-law's posts about Dennis, I finally feel like I can have the courage to do the same. We all miss him. The grief has caught us all off guard. None of us could have anticipated the sadness and the loss that we feel. But it's real. Sometimes it's okay...we are happy and remember the good things. Other times it feels like relief can't come soon enough or in the right ways. Like we are forever broken as a result of what we've seen and had to do. Helplessness, guilt, sorrow...these emotions that can grab hold and take your breath away.

But at the same time, understanding and perspective are all around us. We are learning to accept God's will and His plan. That is the one area where I feel comfort and peace. I know that everything happens for a reason, according to God's plan. And I trust Him. I know that He loves me...all of us. I know that He will never give us more than we can handle. If He thinks I can handle this, then I can...I will. I will do MY duty.

Girl Scouts Everywhere!

I'm not sure if I mentioned that I volunteered to be a co-leader of the girls' girl scout troop this year. It's something I always wanted to do. I was a girl scout, and I worked for the girl scouts as a young lass...you remember my days at Trefoil Raaa-nch, right? Anyway, I think it's a good organization that teaches young girls positive things to get them movin' in positive directions, make them feel good about themselves, and DOESN'T involve b-o-y-s!!

Any-hoo, we had a Bridging Ceremony for the 4th grade girls (Maryn's class) on Friday night. This is when the brownie girl scouts (1st-3rd grade) BRIDGE up to junior girl scouts (4th-6th). Lucky for us Tonican folk, we have plenty o' bridges to choose from. We found the prettiest one in town and had our little ceremony. It went well except for the part where I tried to teach "Make New Friends" as a round, and the girls looked at me like I was crazy...oh, and their parents too. No biggie, right?!?





Saturday was a service area event called "Tricks & Treats". A service area includes MANY troops from your community...in our case all of freakin' south-central Illinois!! The event was huge, chaotic, and not that organized. But the girls had fun, and that's all that matters, right? It doesn't really matter that mapquest had me end up in a field in the middle of nowhere instead of the campsite, right? It doesn't matter that the angry farmer who owned the field had a huge sign that said, "private property, no trespassing, or dogs will attack!", right??? It doesn't matter that we were an hour late, and I had angry parents calling me while I was driving around the middle of nowhere, right? Nah!!









What did matter was that the girls got to paint pumpkins, have s'mores round the campfire, see a magic show, pass off a scrapbooking badge, and play halloween games. All while wearing costumes and hangin' with their homies. That part was fun, and made great memories.

So what that it took 4 Tylenol and 34 ounces of diet pepsi to make my head stop spinning. Not important. Any-hoo, it put us in the festive fallish spirit, and we are stoked for HALLOWEEN!!

Tonight we have our regular monthly meeting...every third Monday. We are passing off a tennis badge. Random? Maybe, but a parent volunteered. One thing I've learned so far in my tenure is that when a parent volunteers for anything, you pounce. So tennis, it is!! I'll be getting my Serena Williams on tonight! Whoop-whoop.

Baptism Memories

"When I got baptized it felt good. I felt pure, like all my sins were washed away. I am glad that my Dad got to baptize me and confirm me. It feels good to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I was glad that my Grandparents could be there, especially that both of my Grandpa’s could give talks. My Grandpa Brown gave the talk on baptism, and my Grandpa Day gave the talk on the Holy Ghost. I am grateful that this is one of the last happy memories that I have of my Grandpa Brown. I know he was proud of me and was happy of my choice to get baptized. I am glad that I got the gift of the Holy Ghost. It has really helped me the past few weeks to feel comfort and peace. I know that the Gospel is true and I am grateful for it and my Savior Jesus Christ. Sister Detloff sang one of my favorite primary songs at my baptism, “I know that my Savior loves me”. I know that this is true. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen."

Avery's talk on her feelings about her Baptism prepared for the Primary Program, October 2010.