Past the Point of Scary

So here it is...the 36th week. I'm finally past the point of scary. I feel very relieved (and very large...have I mentioned that lately?). And I'm more confused than ever. Nothing is really happening at this point. I've been having some contractions...mostly at night, some during the day. But nothing regular and nothing that stops you dead in your tracks. Just lots of those "balling" up of the belly, an ache in your lower back, and pressure in your pelvis feelings. Help me out y'all...is that anything to get excited about? It's been so long that I don't remember what they feel like or when to start my stopwatch or call the doctor. I think I need a refresher course.

Besides that, things are great. I'm off the couch with a vengeance. On Saturday I went to Maryn's game and then walked around Big Lots for awhile. Came home, did some laundry, some cleaning around the house, cooked dinner, etc. It felt weird, but good. Only problem was on Sunday morning when I tried to get up for Church. I was so sore!! My muscles rebelled big time and I realized that even though I can do whatever I want now, I am still 9 mos. pregnant and my body has gotten used to living a life of leisure. Guess I need to take it easier. So I've been doing more, just not as much as I normally do.

I'm kind of in a nesting frenzy lately. I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I made Mark rearrange the sun-room furniture in like 5 different arrangements the other day. And then after all of that, told him to put it all back where it was. Yikes. I fully recognize what's happening to me, but I just feel compelled, ya know? I went downstairs and actually cleaned the girls' playroom this morning. Under normal circumstances I would make them do it, but I just needed to organize. It's the only thing that distracts me at this point.

I guess I had forgotten how it gets at this point...the end of the road. I remember lots of things about when I was pregnant with the girls, but you know how you tend to block out the bad stuff? Well, I guess I did some of that. I had forgotten how uncomfortable it really is at this point. (Insert whiney voice...) I just feel huge, and bloated!! I had all of these goals about keeping my weight gain to a respectable amount, but after the bedrest, it kind of all went downhill. When the calories have nowhere to go, they just settle in my behind and in my face. I had forgotten so many unpleasant things. I had forgotten how even though you're hungry you can't eat very much because there's just no room. I had forgotten how uncomfortable something as simple as breathing can be. I had forgotten how puffy and swollen my fingers, feet, and face could get. I had forgotten how forgetful you can be. I constantly feel like I'm forgetting something lately. AAGH! Save me!!

I know this is temporary. I know it will eventually get better and things will start feeling normal again. I just need to vent, so indulge me. I'm nervous, anxious, excited, happy, sad--all at the same time. I just can't believe this is happening!! After all of this waiting, it's finally time!! We are going to have a baby in our home, in our arms again. It makes me want to giggle and cry simultaneously. I couldn't be happier, but at the same time more scared. This is going to take some serious faith and prayer on my part. I want things to go as smoothly as possible and be in control, but I know that ultimately whatever happens happens, and will work out regardless of how much I worry or fret. It'll be fine. We've come this far and been blessed so much already. I know that I'm not alone. I am well taken care of.

So wish me luck peeps. I will try and post uplifting thoughts in the days and weeks ahead, hopefully more like days instead of weeks. :-)

And any advice you have is greatly appreciated (as always!!)